​​How to Make Internal Audit Harder

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All right you wimps. I'm tired of hearing the whining, the moaning, the bellyaching, the complaining, the kvetching, the griping, grumbling, and grousing. Yeah, auditing is hard. But it is stress that strengthens us. And it is time we took it up a notch. If we want to be the best danged auditors we can be, then we need to make our jobs even harder.

​Toward that end, I now present my suggestions for how to make Internal Audit harder

 Set your Word font color to white.

 Make every Friday casual workpapers day.

 Disable spelllchek.

 Rather than using a risk-based approach to develop the plan, use a "Risk"-based approach. (Asia is always included because it is worth 7 points.)

 No more coffee.

 GRC now stands for Gaga, Runescape, and Craigslist.

 Two words - No charter.

 CAE reports to the ...whoops, that one might already be happening.

 Disputes with auditees are settled with smart phones at 20 paces.

 The department is not allowed to participate in the company's Harlem Shake video.

 All reports are available to the public. (Ask any governmental auditor about that one.)

 Bayonet the unharmed.

 Professional business attire required when working from home. (No jammies; that means you.)

 Documentation is required documenting that you documented the documentation of how documentation was documented.

 More meetings.

 An audit universe composed of billions and billions of auditable entities

Auditors must enter every office Gangnam Style

Actually, rather than making auditing harder, it might make it more fun. Oh well...

So, what would you do to make auditing harder?

​The opinions expressed by Internal Auditor's bloggers may differ from policies and official statements of The Institute of Internal Auditors and its committees and from opinions endorsed by the bloggers' employers or the editors of Internal Auditor. The magazine is pleased to provide you an opportunity to share your thoughts about these blog posts. Some comments may be reprinted elsewhere, online or offline.



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