All right you wimps. I'm tired of hearing the whining, the moaning, the bellyaching, the complaining, the kvetching, the griping, grumbling, and grousing. Yeah, auditing is hard. But it is stress that strengthens us. And it is time we took it up a notch. If we want to be the best danged auditors we can be, then we need to make our jobs even harder.
Toward that end, I now present my suggestions for how to make Internal Audit harder
Set your Word font color to white.
Make every Friday casual workpapers day.
Rather than using a risk-based approach to develop the plan, use a "Risk"-based approach. (Asia is always included because it is worth 7 points.)
No more coffee.
GRC now stands for Gaga, Runescape, and Craigslist.
Two words - No charter.
CAE reports to the ...whoops, that one might already be happening.
Disputes with auditees are settled with smart phones at 20 paces.
The department is not allowed to participate in the company's Harlem Shake video.
All reports are available to the public. (Ask any governmental auditor about that one.)
Bayonet the unharmed.
Professional business attire required when working from home. (No jammies; that means you.)
Documentation is required documenting that you documented the documentation of how documentation was documented.
An audit universe composed of billions and billions of auditable entities
Auditors must enter every office Gangnam Style
Actually, rather than making auditing harder, it might make it more fun. Oh well...
So, what would you do to make auditing harder?