​​A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Audit

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​Two auditors walk into a bar. "What'll you have?" the bartender asks. "I'll take a Solid Finding," the first one says. "I'll have a Weak Finding," says the second one. The bartender pours their drinks. Another guy at the bar calls the bartender over and whispers, "What's the difference between a Solid Finding and a Weak Finding?" "I don't know," the bartender answers, "but the good news is they don't know either."

What is auditor hell? A roomful of wounded and no bayonet.​

A man drives up to an accident — car into a tree. He walks up to the driver and says, "You've been in an accident." The driver says, "You must be an auditor." The man is surprised. "How did you know?" he asks. "Because," the driver answers, "You told me something I already knew and have provided no help."


I've gotten in trouble for some of the things I've written — in particular that I'm reinforcing negative stereotypes of auditors. Well, I hate to break it to you, but that is part of the role of humor — to point out the foibles and inconsistencies that exist.   

And this blog will never be as much about humor — although I hope there is some of that — as it is about change and trying to take a sideways look at what we do and what we are. I want us to go in unusual directions, taking the road less traveled, maybe while listening to a different drummer. As Steely Dan says, "This is the time of the expanding man." (That one was for you, Julie.) And expanding what we are and expanding where we will go includes picking on the things that we are, sometimes justly, accused of being.

And now, the funniest auditor joke I know. Why did the auditor cross the road? Because he looked in the workpapers and that's what they did last year.​



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